The Long Path To Salvation
by Marvin Snape
Summary: What happens to Severus Snape after book 6. What really happened and who is Severus really. This is my first story and i hope you like it. Spoilers HBP
1. Chapter 1

It was a cold summer night for this time of year. In the middle of August it wasn't what everyone wanted. Children had to stay inside because of the rain that had been terrorizing the land for days. Floods and mudslides were happening in the North. It was already dark outside and no one seemed to want to leave his or her house, especially one.

His house was standing in the middle of nowhere on a low hill. The long grasses around the house were all laying flat on the ground from the howling winds and a warm light came from one of the windows. You couldn't actually call it a house; it was more of a small cabin with a living room, kitchen, bedroom and bathroom. The warm light came from the fire in the fireplace and a man was sitting in a big comfortable armchair.

The man didn't seem to be aware of his surroundings at all but more in deep thought. The thoughts didn't seem to be happy ones as he was frowning the whole time and his eyes spoke sadness. In his hand was a glass probably filled with some sort of liqueur. He was sitting so still that he looked like a statue but suddenly he moved to take a sip of his drink. When his arm came down you could see a tear slowly rolling down his cheek and a soft whisper could be heard "I'm sorry".

He had messed everything up that was important in his life. He could never live with what he had done but he couldn't kill himself because it wasn't his time yet. He knew he would die eventually and probably sooner than later but he still had to set some things right. There were so many things he wanted to set right, a cure for lycanthropy, getting Black back and most of all getting the person back who always had faith in him. Who actually seemed to love him as his father should have. But most of those things he probably could never do.

He was getting close to the cure for lycanthropy but he would know tomorrow is this new one was any closer to his goal. The other two were much harder, if not impossible. It wasn't that he liked Black but he shouldn't have died, at least not like that and maybe there was a way to get behind the veil in the Ministry of Magic. That only left the person he had killed himself, the most important person in his life, Dumbledore. He didn't want to kill him and he had done so much to prevent that. It had been an confusing evening when it happened. He hadn't been informed before hand so he couldn't warn anyone. When he finally did find out there had been no way out


	2. Chapter 2

_Flashback: _

_Snape was waiting in his room after he had heard that Dumbledore had left. Hopefully everything was all right. Last time Dumbledore went on a crusade it had cost him his hand. He had been shocked when he had found Dumbledore in the hospital wing where his hand was slowly being consumed by a curse, a curse he had invented. Immediately he knew there was no cure, he could stop the curse consuming Dumbledore whole body but he could not heal the wound. He had to see how one of his own curses hurting the one he loved._

_Suddenly he heard a commotion outside his rooms and a rushed rapping on his door_

"_Severus, there are Death eaters everywhere and some students are hurt. We need to do something!" He heard squeaking behind behind the door._

_Great Flitwick. The little professor had always been nice to him. Any moment the death eaters roaming through the castle could discover him and when they did he would have to kill him!_

_He quickly opened the door and there was Flitwick with behind him The bushy one of the terrible trio and Luna if he remembered correctly. _

_Fliwick quickly came in and closed the door behind him_

"_Stupefy!" Severus whispered as the small professor just turned around. It was the only thing he could think of at the moment and it wasn't a minute to late. He picked up the little man and laid him onto the couch making sure he was alright. As he walked to the door he remembered the girls. He quickly opened the door and told thm thate Flitwick passed out and pushed them inside._

_He had just started to walk towards the hall when two death eaters came around the corner Crab and Goyle senior judging by their posture._

"_Come on the fight is in the entrance hall" He heard the plump voice of Crab_

_He had no choice then to follow them into the entrance hall. The sight that greeted him there was terrible. Students were trying to hold of death eaters that were sending curses to them without pausing. Then he saw what he feared most. He saw Draco Malfoy rushing up the stairs through a barrier that apparently only let death eaters trough. And he remembered the unbreakable vow he made with Narcissa. This must be the task she was talking about that Voldemort gave Draco. He fought his way to the stairs and when he finally reached it he quickly ran after him. It must have taken him a good few minutes and when he reached the tower door and ran through it he knew that getting death eaters inside Hogwarts wasn't Draco's only task._


	3. Chapter 3

_Dumbledore was standing there, seemingly hurt by something or he would have taken down the Death eaters himself. He could see the doubt on Draco's face and he knew Draco couldn't do it and where is that damn Potter._

"_Severus please" The soft words of Dumbledore reached his ears with deafening pain. They had talked about this scenario. They never could agree about this and now the moment was there. What should I do. The only thing he could think of was what he had been practicing for months and never got it totally right._

"_Avada Kedavra" He said without trying to mean it and waving his wand and doing Stupefy at the same time with wandless magic. Again it went wrong like so many times before. A large jolt of energy came from his wand hitting Dumbledore right in the chest. It would have done much if they had been on the ground but the energy threw Dumbledore of the roof making him plumed to the ground. Killing him on impact._

_Severus stared at the spot where Dumbledore fell over the edge. His friend, his mentor the only one who believed in him. He had killed him. The other Death eaters saying something pushed him into action. He had to make them leave or the students wouldn't survive when they took over the castle. _

"_Aurors are coming we have to run or we will be overpowered by them" He heard himself say. Somehow they believed him and they quickly ran down. He had to push Draco in front of him down the stairs through the hall and onto the grounds. That's where Potter suddenly showed up. _

"_Run" was all he called after Draco and the others and turned around to face Potter._

_He could never explain what happened to Dumbledore but all he could do was giving him the last hints that he had given Potter with handing him his own potion book he had used when he was 16. Potter didn't know it and he would be to proud to accept the help he wanted to give him for defeating the Dark Lord. Potter needed to succeed. The conversation he couldn't remember that well anymore he only remembered that he yelled somewhere he was the Half Blood Prince._

Now here he was sitting, drinking and crying in front of the blazing fire that somehow couldn't warm him from the inside. No one would ever see him like this weak and miserable. Having feelings at all.

More to come soon. Please review.


	4. Chapter 4

Authers note:

I wanted to thank **duj **for the great review and pointing out the mistakes! I changed it and I hope it's better now.

**Back to the story:**

He had been hiding in this house since that dreadful night. He couldn't go back to the Dark Lord since he hadn't called him at all. He hadn't seen any of the other Death eaters yet so he also didn't know how the Dark Lord would take his little stunt. He knew the Dark Lord wanted Dumbledore dead but he also knew that the Dark Lord had wanted to kill Dumbledore himself as a form of statement how powerful he was. Maybe the Dark Lord didn't care about it but it was taking him a long time to call.

Lifting his sleeve he still saw the tattoo that had changed his whole life. It wasn't as clear as he had suspected but still no sign at all that he was being called. He wanted to be called even if the Dark Lord was going to kill him. It would be over then.

The sun was slowly rising slowly above the horizon and the rain had stopped sometime during the night. He hadn't slept again like so many nights. He rose from his chair and slowly went to the hatch in the middle of the room. When he opened it a certain smell hit his large nose and he could smell all the ingredients working. Maybe this one wasn't a total failure.

Down the small wooden stairs he went to the small cold basement where he had set up a small potion lab to work on one of his goals. There were some magic lights hanging in the corners and a small fire below a cauldron gave all the light he needed.

The cauldron was bubbling softly and a purple haze emitted from it. Well that seemed actually quite promising. He took a clean ladle from a rack on the wall and stirred the potion slowly. He had of course no testing person but he did have a piece of werewolf flesh. He ladled some of the potion in a bowl and dropped a piece of the flesh into it. Picking it out again with a knife he put it on the counter.

Waiting for five minutes nothing seemed to happen so he could just as well vanish this potion.

"I'm one of the best potion masters in the world and I probably made pumpkin juice" He let out in a sigh feeling a headache come on

He walked into the storeroom to find some potion for the throbbing pain behind his eyes that probably was all the firewhiskey he had. Finding it he took a large sip and put it back on the shelf. He defiantly needed to make more.

Suddenly he heard a sizzling sound which made him run back to the lab. Had someone found him?


	5. Chapter 5

Running into the potion lab he saw the piece of werewolf flesh steaming and bubbling. He quickly threw a shielding charm over the table and watched how the flesh was rolling around.

"Well at least it isn't pumpkin juice"

The flesh seemed to calm down and lifting the shielding spell he examined the flesh. At first sight it seemed to have become human again but that was not a guarantee. Using several spells to detect lycanthropy he did have to say that it seemed to work. The next stage that had gone wrong many times as well was seeing if it didn't kill the person you were giving the potion too.

He walked to one of the shelves with a large cage on it. Putting his hand inside he grabbed one of the whit mice he had left.

"I'm sorry little one but I guess you are next" He hated hurting or killing them but there was no other way, Maybe he could get Grayback to drink it and a slow sadistic smile came on. That was a thought he needed to keep. That guy loved being a wolf what would happen if I took it from him.

Taking the mouse to the table he put it under the imperius spell. He took put a saucer on the table and poured some of the potion on it. After he made the mouse drink it he put it in a separate tank so he could check on it. He took the mouse with him upstairs and put it on the coffee table next to the armchair. Making himself a strong cup of coffee he set out on reading the rest of the morning.

Picking up one of the books he had quickly grabbed when he fled from Spinner's End and sitting down in the armchair. The mouse was still walking around in it's tank sniffing it's new environment. Scanning the book cover he read "A Smile for every occasion" By Henrietta Siewbert. It was one of the books Albus gave him every year. He had never read any of them. Opening the book for the first time he saw something scribbled with curly letters on the first page

For my dear Severus, my best friend.

May you one day smile again,

Albus Dumbledore

This was the second time this week that a tear rolled down his cheek again.

"I'm sorry" he whispered as he close the book again. He couldn't deal with it now.

**Please review**


	6. Chapter 6

Slowly the sun made his way through the sky and bird flew through the clear blue sky. Finally summer had set in but the occupant of the little house hadn't woken up yet. The little mouse in the glass tank scurried around looking for water or something to eat walking around in circles. So far his nose hadn't picked up anything and he was getting rather thirsty. The man in the chair was just getting aware of the hurried scratches the mouse made on the glass but he didn't want to wake up yet and face another day.

When the sun finally got to his eyes he could not escape anymore and as he slowly opened his eyes he heard his neck pop. Clearly humans weren't made to sleep in a sitting position. He looked at the mouse and awareness of the breakthrough he had had last night came back. He picked the mouse out of the tank and took it to the little kitchen.

"You are one lucky mouse you know" Putting the small creature on the tabletop. Taking a dish he put some water in it and then took out an apple. He cut it in half and put one half next to the water. It hadn't reached the table yet or the mouse was already sniffing it and taking a quick bite.

He ate the rest of the apple himself and made some coffee. As he sipped the black liquid he tried some spells to check on the mouse health. Everything seemed alright and when the mouse finished he picked it back up.

Walking back downstairs to the lab he put it with the other mice. Carrying the whole tank upstairs where they could get some light.

"I will set you guys free tomorrow if you friend is still alright" He didn't need them anymore and killing them would be pointless so freeing them was the best thing.

He put them on a shelf next to the window and his desk where he could watch them he set out on a task he never thought he would have to do.

_To Remus Lupin,_

He picked up the paper and threw it away. He would never start with Remus. Taking a new sheet he began again

_To Mr. Lupin,_

_Don't be alarmed by this owl as I wish you no harm and no one else either. I know that what I did is something you all will never understand and I still don't understand it myself. I know it will be hard to trust me but I am trying to still set things right and one of those things was a task Dumbledore asked me to do. He always wanted me to make a cure for you even though he knew I despised you. I never blamed you for what happened that night as I know it was Black. I have been working on a cure for 5 years now and I think I have come very far. I will not know for sure until I have tried it on a real werewolf like yourself. I hope you understand that I don't trust any of you so please keep this letter personal._

_I Hope you will contact me. You can use the bird I send this with as it knows where to find me._

_Best regards,_

_SS_

Well it wasn't exactly what he had wanted it would be enough. He folded the parchment and used some wax to seal it.

"Rashna" He called his black eagle owl to him as the wax was drying and the large bird flew to the desk.

"Take this to Remus Lupin, he probably is at the Weasley's door the wedding. Wait till he's alone when you give it and wait for a reply".

The large bird hooded and flew out of the window holding the letter in it's beak.

There was nothing else to do till Rashna returned but his discovery was slowly making him more hopeful that maybe he could get the others back as well and kill the Dark Lord as well.

**Thanks everyone for their reviews. I will try and make the chapters longer and more fluid but it's my first story and English isn't my native language. I hope it will get bettering time**


	7. Chapter 7

It had been a busy day at the Weasley's house, they were all preparing for the huge wedding for Fleur and Bill. The twins, Harry and Ron had been decorating the garden since the rain stopped. Molly had almost changed the plans when the rain didn't seem to stop but this morning the sun had been shining brightly and the forecast for tomorrow was excellent. They had already put up poles and a raised the ground a little where the bride and groom would be so everyone could see them. Hermione and Ginny were using levitation charms to hang white and gold ribbons from pole to pole.

Remus and Tonks had been setting up tables and chairs for the guests. Molly had been baking all day and every time anyone came near her she would give them orders so when noon came everyone was sitting at the bottom of the garden eating a small lunch the twins had stolen from the kitchen. They hadn't stolen anything important and it was not like Molly would miss it among the mount of festivity food. Remus was feeling like he was being stared at the whole time and he just couldn't shake the feeling. He didn't want to worry anyone as he didn't want to scare them when it was probably just his minds playing ticks.

They were finishing the decorations that afternoon and Remus excused himself, it had only been two nights since the full moon and he needed some time to recover. He still got wolfsbane from Snape and he didn't even know why he dared to drink it since last June but he didn't dare to take it from anyone less and he couldn't pay anyone good enough. He didn't want to loose Tonks and he was sure he would once she had seen the savage wolf he was. He had a little box that was a duplicate of the one Snape had. It was something like the vanishing cabinets but it wasn't large enough for a person to get through. Every day at around 8 p.m. a goblet with wolfsbane would appear and he was always afraid there wouldn't be one or it would be something else.

He dropped himself on the bed and started to take of his shoes, he was way to tired to even take a shower or take his clothes off and as he threw his last shoe on the ground he fell backwards onto the pillows with his eyes closed. He was happy no one asked him why he wanted to leave but it still felt like he left them with all the work. Slowly the feeling of being watched cam back and it felt way closer now he could even swear it was in his room. As he slowly opened his eyes he became aware of two large yellow eyes hanging above his head just inches from his nose. He quickly sat up and stared at the large owl perched on the bed. It had a letter in it's beak and it was waiting for him to take it.

"Have you been spying on me?" He asked the owl gently as he reached for the letter. The owl hooded softly as he dropped the letter in Remus's hand.

"I'm sorry I don't have any treats for you" he said to the owl but it just kept on sitting there. Remus turned the letter over in his hands and as he looked at the seal he know whom it was from, Snape. With shaking hands he opened it and when it didn't exploded he started to read it.

**Thanks alaskangirl24 for her review and also everyone else who read and reviewed. I am not sure how much I can update during X-mas **

**Happy X-mas everyone**


	8. Chapter 8

Severus had been busy all day working on new potions. Glass vials were everywhere and a vile stench was hanging in the small cramped basement. He should have used an engorgement charm but he didn't expect to be brewing this much but after his latest success he suddenly had gotten a new impulse to brew. He was working on a potion where you could leave your body for a while and look dead and return whenever you wanted to your body. He didn't know any other way to get into the realm of the dead. Maybe it was useless if you didn't really die but you could always use it to scare people. Those Weasley twins would certainly like it but they could never invent something like this. They did have a small plus point with him as they did show some potential in potion but they only ever used it for jokes. He had also loved their way of leaving the school.

He had been busy all day and it was already night outside when he suddenly heard hooting upstairs. Rashna had returned. He had almost forgotten he had send the letter this morning as he had been totally absorbed by his new project. He quickly rushed up the stairs and found the bird sitting on the back of the chair holding a piece of paper in her claws

" Well done Rashna" As he took the letter and gave her an owl treat he had in one of his pockets. The bird took it and watched as her owner sat down on the large chair. He quickly tore it open and scanned the letter.

_To Severus Snape,_

_I don't know why I trust you but I want to thank you for providing me with the wolfsbane every day. I can't trust you and I'm sure you understand but it would be an honour if I could try it and it worked but I'm not sure if I should. I can't come to you till after the wedding and I don't even know where to go. You can send anything through the box. I check it every day at the same time and no one knows about it. It's the safest way to communicate as they might spot your owl. I hope we can one day sort out everything but I'm not sure if everyone will let you back in._

_My sincere thanks and I will wait for you to contact me._

_Remus Lupin_

He let out a deep sigh as he knew he was at least going to set one thing right. He took a piece of parchment and scribbled some directions on it and took the first thing in sight to make a port key. It was a small empty glass vial and he wrapped it in some paper. Do not open written on top. He put it all in the small box on the bookshelves and closed the lit. When he opened it again all the contents was gone. It would take 2 days before Lupin would show up and that gave him more time to experiment with new potions.

**This one didn't go exactly as I wanted in this chapter but I will try and make it better in the next few when there will be more action**


	9. Chapter 9

It had been a week and he still hadn't heard anything from Lupin, the new potions weren't any better yet either and he was getting restless again with nothing to occupy his mind. He had started to make some plans what to do before the battle that was sure to take place this year. The Dark Lord wouldn't want Potter to get any stronger or gather more followers so he needed something from inside to aid him. As he was still alive and he didn't feel any torture pain through his tattoo yet he was getting confident that the Dark Lord would accept him back with maybe a little torture. If he was to get back in he could try and eliminate some of the more dangerous Death Eeaters

He had even made a hit list to see who shouldn't be in the battle.

_Greyback at least the wolf side_

_Lucius Malfoy should be locked up before hand_

_Bellatrix Lestrange should have a false wand so she could feel how it is to be powerless_

_And so the list went on._

He loved the idea of Wormtail on the field. He would love to kill that slimy bastard who thought he could spy on him. He would love to see Bellatrix killed by Neville that would be just ironic. She thought she was invincible and he loved to see her suffer, as she loved to torture him on orders from the Dark Lord.

As he was drinking a nice glass of fore whiskey that he had gotten from Dumbledore he was actually happy to be sitting in front of the fire. Suddenly there was a loud knocking on the door which made him jump up from his chair.

Had they found him but when he rushed to open the door he knew that it couldn't be them as he had set many wards that no one knew about and as he opened the door he saw the face he had expected and hoped to see for days.

"Good evening Snape" Said the uncertain voice of Lupin. "Great to see you" and a small smile came upon his feature

"Good evening Lupin, come in" As he opened the door wider to let the man in. He could sense the dread Lupin was feeling to see him again. "I won't bite even tough everyone things I will" as he smirk came on his face"

Lupin quickly entered and walked on into the small living room. Snape followed him and offered a chair to the man. He held up the fire whiskey bottle and asked, "Want some, it's from a great year"

"I could use it" And one of the large smiles Lupin was known about came onto his face and they settled in the chair.

It had been silent for a few minutes with neither men knowing what to say and eventually Lupin decided to start or he would storm out of the house as quick as he could.

"So you invented a new potion?" he asked while looking at the silent man.

"Yeah that's what you do when you are a potion master" Snape snapped back. He never felt comfortable with anyone near him and he was starting to wonder if he should have invited him at all

"So will this potion cure me completely?" Lupin tried again

"Well let's hope so because I have no idea what to do if this is not going to work. You always have a chance that something goes wrong but I think we have about 85 chance that it will work" Good talk about the potion he thought to himself that I can do. As long as he doesn't start talking about what happened.

"Well that's a chance I am willing to take, I haven't told anyone about this but what if something goes wrong?"

"If something goes wrong I will of course inform them I guess. Have you anything you want me to say or do" Snape said

"Just give these letters that will explain everything and I guess we will start now because I'm getting nervous"

"Follow me" Snape stood up and lead them down to the basement. He transfigured one of the tables in a bed and went to the cabinet. "Lay down on the bed Lupin in case something goes wrong"

Lupin sat down on the edge and looked as Snape brought the vial over. It was a deep purple colour that didn't look like any poison he knows so it is probably safe. He took the vial from Snape

"Let's start with on dose I have 3 more bottles but I think this should be enough" Snape said as he handed Lupin the vial.

"Bottoms up" Lupin said and drowned the potion as quick as he could without thinking. He didn't feel anything but did lie down onto the bed.

"It takes about an hour before anything should happen" He took out a chair and sat down watching and waiting.

"Ok well uhm… what shall we do?" Lupin asked, as he was getting nervous.

"Want to play some chess? I have one upstairs I could get it" Snape offered at least chess didn't involve to much chatting

"That would be nice"

Snape went to get the chess set and they settled down for a long chess game without to much talking.

**Well that was a little but longer hope you liked it. Next we will hear from Voldemort and we will see what happens to Lupin.**

**Thanx for the reviews everyone**


	10. Chapter 10

It had been quiet in the small house on the hill for around an hour only the rustle of clothes and an occasional tick of something being put down disturbed the piece. They had been playing for an hour now and it Snape was clearly winning.

Suddenly Lupin grabbed his stomach and let out a small groan.

"It is beginning!" Snape said as he quickly jumped up and relocated the chess set to a table. "Lie down on the bed, I'm not going to carry you back if you fall out because you kept sitting on the edge."

As Lupin quickly lay back another pain cramp hit him and groaned. "Is it supposed to do this?"

"I don't know" As he shrugged and cast a few spells. "It's re-aligning your DNA and taking the werewolf parasite DNA out. I guess that hurts"

"Thanks for the warning" Lupin growled, as the pain was getting worse.

"I guess I should have warned you but I didn't actually know anyway you are warned now" He put a monitoring spell on Lupin and sat down next to him.

"How long will it take" Lupin asked through his teeth while he tried to find a better way to lie down. "It feels like the transformations but without the release of energy to the growing of fur and teeth"

"It shouldn't take to long, maybe 15 minutes. I am monitoring the change with a spell and it is quite quick I would say around 25 is now normal DNA"

"Ahhhhhh…" Lupin screamed as he started to twist more and more. "It's getting to much"

"LAY STILL lab rat or you will destroy my lab!" He quickly put a binding spell on Lupin to keep him from jumping of the bed.

Suddenly Lupin stopped and lay still on the bed. Quickly Snape jumped up and checked him all over with a few different spells.

"I guess it also makes you sleep. At least that will keep you quiet for a while" He got up and started to check on some of the experiment he had been working on the day before while he let the potion take care of Lupin for a while. It was nice to have someone around for a while who didn't ask him anything about what had happened. Of course Lupin was only there because there was a chance that he would be cured but it was nice none the less.

As he worked all night while Lupin was still sleeping and healing he checked on the mice in the tank. He had promised to let them go and hadn't done it yet. He picked up the mouse he had used the potion on and it still seemed fine. To be sure he casted a few spells and noticed that the mouse was pregnant as well. "Well I'm sure Lupin would be glad to hear that he will still be able to produce children" but at the same time thought please no…. not more of those brats. He wasn't a teacher anymore of course but he still thought like one after 15 years of teaching.

He was actually hoping to teach a little more, Maybe he could get to Potter through Lupin so he could teach him a little more so the little brat could at least kill the Dark Lord and free them all.

"Hmmmm…" he suddenly heard and saw that Lupin had started turning again. In a few strides he was next to the bed and casting a few spells to check on him. He was at 98 of normal DNA and he was waking up again.

"How are you feeling?" Snape asked as he looked at the man who seemed to be doing fine.

"I feel like someone flew into me with those new Nimbus there is. Is everything alright?" he mumbled

"Well I think it worked but we can't be sure yet as you still have some werewolf DNA left but we will see" As Lupin sat up.

"Are you feeling well enough to get up and eat something because I don't feel like playing a house elf for you!"

Lupin pushed himself of the bed and stumbled to the stair. Snape followed him and helped him a little so he wouldn't fall back down and be there any longer then Snape wanted. He pushed the werewolf back in the chair and went to the kitchen to get some food.

He didn't have a lot in house and they would have to make it with some French cheese toast and some pate. He also made a nice strong coffee for himself and tea for Lupin and brought it back into the livingroom. Setting the food on the table he gave Lupin his tea and sat down in his chair with the coffee.

"I feel a lot better now already actually. It's like I am drained but not of energy but of bricks." Lupin said as he sniffed at the tea.

"I guess that's because the werewolf DNA is actually a parasite who needs energy to sustain itself." Taking a sip of his coffee and looking at Lupin if he could see anything wrong yet.

"We do have a small problem I haven't found an answer to yet, what should we tell the others, if I am suddenly cured they will of course suspect something." Taking a sip of his tea and looking as Snape for an answer.

"Just tell them what you did when you get back and I'm sure they will just test you and find out everything is alright. I will obliviate you so you won't know where this house is and the problem is solved." He stood up and walked to the stairs to the basement. "I forgot something you keep on eating I will be back in a second"

He quickly went downstairs and picked up the tank from the table and took it back up stairs.

"What's that?" he heard when he had just gotten through the hole. "These are mice. I use them for experimenting" He took the tank to the window and took the lit off. He put it on it's side on the ground and left it there for the mice to climb out on their own time.

"Why did you let them go then?" Lupin asked as he got up to look out the window seeing a small white nose sniffing the outside of the tank.

"I promised I would let them go if your potion worked" Sitting back down and making him self some toast.

"I didn't know you had such sentiment" Lupin smiled at him and walked back to the chair.

Snape was just about to take a bite when suddenly a pain shot through his arm.

**Well another chapter and finally it's turning out like I wanted. I think you can all guess what will happen in the next chapter. **


	11. Chapter 11

As he dropped the food he grabbed his arm. Finally de Dark Lord had called him but on the wrong moment.

"You have to leave Lupin…now" He said while he got up holding his arm

"He's calling, isn't he?" Lupin replied as he got up as well.

"No I'm just grabbing my arm to see if it's still THERE" He snapped as he quickly went to the small bedroom to take his special robe and mask from the closet.

"I will wait here if you want so you can check me over when you get back. They don't expect me back for 2 days" Lupin said as he followed Snape into the bedroom.

"I don't need you to wait here for me just because you pity me!" Snape replied angrily as he shoved himself past Lupin "Just go home and forget about me."

"I'm not doing this for you but for myself, what if something goes wrong? You are the only one who knows anything about the potion you brewed and I don't feel like dying right now" Lupin snapped back knowing this was the only way in which he could make Snape let him stay. Of course he worried about his health but he was more concerned about Snape. When he had opened the door Lupin had to look twice to be sure he wasn't looking at a corpse. Snape's face was all sunken in and whiter then usual. His hair had gotten longer and was hanging in long dreads around his face like he hadn't washed it for weeks. His clothes were hanging on him like they were 3 sizes to big so he could almost guess what Snape looked like underneath them.

"Fine, stay for all I care just don't touch anything in the basement. You can use the bed if you want to sleep. It's clean." Snape said as he walked out the door.

Lupin stood in the doorway looking at Snape's back while he walked down a path putting on his mask and exposing his left arm. Suddenly there was a soft pop and he was gone.

As the world came back into his view he could see he had been apparated to a large room that was probably in a manor. He hadn't been here before and as he looked behind him he could see a small group of death eaters had already arrived. They had formed a half circle around a chair where the Dark Lord was sitting. The had left an opening where he could walk through to greet his master.

As he occluded his mind he strode with confident steps to the group and knelt down when he reached the Dark Lord. There wasn't much lightening but he could see all the scary details of Voldemorts face. He seemed to get more ugly by the day. He kissed the hem of his robes and said the appropriate words. "I greet you master, to serve you and worship you" He stayed kneeled down waiting for the Dark Lord to tell him to go or to be tortured. He hated saying that line but he found it easy to make it sound convincing after so many years.

"Severussss" the hissing voice of the Dark Lord sounded after several minutes. "You have disappointed me. I expected you to let the boy do it's purpose. I send him on that job and by killing Dumbledore yourself you have disobeyed my direct orders! What do you have to say"

"I couldn't stand it any longer my Lord, I have spied on him for you for several years and I thought I would never be able to get away from him during your absence. When I heard of you ordering Draco to kill him I needed to do it myself. It has been so painful for me to serve him." Snape replied with a strong voice. He didn't want to sound like that quivering idiot Wormtail but this was the only way out of being killed.

"Tsk tsk Severussss, you never seemed to eager to kill him before. Look up at me…"

As he lifted his head to look the Dark Lord in his eyes he could feel the probing of his mind. He quickly showed the pictures that he wanted him to see in a strange order so it seemed like floating images in his brain. He showed him a few images of Albus telling him what needed to be done against the Dark Lord that were no longer of any importance. A few images that he and Albus made so he could use them on such occasions. One of them was Albus being angry at him for not having enough information and another was Albus forcing him to drink his own veritasum. It had of course happened or the images wouldn't have looked real but it was all a big show carefully planned by them together. The images were perfect for this occasion.

"I can see you have suffered but that is no reason to not follow orders. Bellatrix and Goyle punish him for what he has done but he still needs to be able to work." As he finished Severus got up and passed Bellatrix and Goyle who had left the circle to take him with them. They usually had to force people to come with them but he wouldn't give them that pleasure. Bellatrix quickly catches up and took her place in front opening the door and leading them down a corridor. They entered a room and as soon as Goyle closed the door Bellatrix hit him with the first curse.

"CRUCIO" She yelled and instantly he sank to his knees as the pain his him. He hated this spell but as he had been hit so many times with it he was getting used to it.

As she lifted the spell she walked over to him. "You don't know how long I have wanted to do this Severus. Crucio" As she hit him again "You always got away using the spying act as a reason you couldn't listen but now you have finally crossed our masters line again."

The pain was soaring through his body and he fell down on his back. "I had hoped he would kill you when you didn't show up at the graveyard but I guess he believed you explanation." She kicked him hard in the side as she lifted the spell

"CRUCIO" she yelled again when he tried to get up. And at the same time Goyle hit him with a spell also and slowly he lost conscious and let them abuse his body.

**Thank you all for reading and please review!**


	12. Chapter 12

Slowly he became aware of the pain in his body, and the cold hard stone he was lying on. He slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position but the moment he was sitting the dizziness came back. He had to sit still for a while till his eyes came back into focus. He could see he was still in the room they had tortured him. There was blood laying all over the floor and he was sure it was his. He took his wand from his sleeve and was happy to see it wasn't broken.

Testing first he noticed the wards were down enough so he could appeaate out. He tried to focus as much as he could and with a soft pop apparated home.

He landed with a soft thud on the ground. He had miscalculated the fact that he had been sitting and had apparated a little to high. When he hit the ground he fell down again and couldn't get up. He was looking at the door when suddenly it burst open and Lupin came storming out.

"Severus, is that you?" but all he could do was grunt and hope he didn't die.

Lupin quickly came to him and levitated him into the house and into the bathroom. He started to undress Snape and opened the tab in the bathtub. When he had finally peeled all the clothes off he picked the man up and sat him in the tub. He was all covered in bruises and blood and was way to thin.

"potion…" Snape murmured, pointing to a cabinet on the wall. Lupin went to it and opened the door. He saw two potions and took them both holding them in front of Snape

Snape grabbed the blue one and drank it down till the last drop then laid down in the tub. Lupin started to wash of the blood and saw that some of the cuts were already healing. He was careful not to push to hard but a lot of blood had already dried up and was hard to clean off. He noticed that Snape had fallen unconscious again and when he finished he used a drying spell. He didn't want to make the man feel more uncomfortable then he already was.

Picking him up instead of using a levitation charm he carried Snape back to bed and put a blanket over him. He took another blanket for himself and went to the living room to sleep on the couch.

When morning came Lupin woke in a still quiet house. He tiptoed to the bedroom and saw that Snape was still sleeping and looking a lot better already. He made his way to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. There wasn't much but he could make eggs and some toast from some old bread. As he set to work he noticed that he was feeling better than usual and opened one of the windows to let some fresh air in. When he finished he took the plates to the bedroom together with coffee and put it on the bedside table.

"Wake up" Lupin softly said not wanting to scare him.

"What do you want fur ball" Snape replied opening his eyes and looking at Lupin as if he wanted to kill him.

"I made some breakfast greasy bat" Lupin said happily and placed the eggs on Snape lap and started eating his own.

"I don't need a maid but I'm sure they still need one in the Leaky Cauldron" Snape replied while stabbing his egg.

"I know you don't just eat that up and when you feel well enough you can give me a check up and I will leave."

"Fine" Snape snapped back and started to eat like he was eager to get rid of the guy sitting there watching him.

"I guess You Know Who wasn't that happy about what happened either" Lupin tried, he wanted to know what had happened and maybe find out what was going on.

"I guess not but at least I'm not dead yet" Although I want to be dead he immediately thought.

"So what are you going to do now? Are you going to stay with him and fight for him or are you still going to try and help us?" This was one of the questions that had been going through Lupins mind since Snape had left for the meeting.

Snape hadn't thought about it much yet and if he thought about it now he knew there was only one answer. He hated the Dark Lord and he knew he could never get away from him because of that damn mark on his arm. He would simply be killed or tortured till he returned and then be killed.

"I would like to still be on the good side but I'm sure none of you will welcome me back with open arms" Snape finally replied.

"I'm sure not everyone will want you back anymore but that doesn't mean all of us. We can make an arrangement you know." Lupin said as he looked expectantly at Snape but when he didn't say anything he continued.

"You could give me information through the box and I will try in the mean time to clear your name a little."

"That would be nice at least I have some purpose then." Snape replied and then got out of bed and put on some clothes.

"Well let's get you checked out and then you can go" Snape said while he got his wand and started to do some spells.

"Am I clear?" Lupin asked with excitement

"Almost 100, I guess that you will hardly notice anything during the next full moon but to be sure I want you here then." Snape replied

"I will be, but I have to go now or they will start worrying." Lupin said

After Lupin had left Snape was all by himself. It had been nice to have someone around to talk to again but now it was again quiet. He checked on the potions in the basement but as they had been unattended to long they were ruined so he vanished them all with a simple flick of the wrist. He made his way slowly upstairs and crawled back into bed. Everything was still painful but it could never overrule the pain he felt inside.

**HAPPY NEW YEAR. Please review**


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